So there are 2 “major” things about our wedding that I can forecast at least someone getting pissy about… so I checked out what some “experts” had to say about it!
The first is the fact that we have such a large guest list we can’t offer plus ones to everyone! What we’ve decided to do is to give everyone in the Bridal Party a plus one and then only people who have significant boyfriends or girlfriends - like one’s who’ve been dating for a while. The reason that this really shouldn’t be an issue is because all of the other “singletons” coming ALL KNOW EACHOTHER! So it’s not like we’re leaving some single girl in the corner table with the awkward uncle and “that cousin” or something.
Here is the insert from what THE Martha (Stewart) had to say:Inviting Plus Ones
If your relatives or friends are engaged to be married, their fiances (or fiancees) must be invited; their live-in romantic partners must be as well. However, if they are only dating, you need not invite their boyfriend or girlfriend. Should you decide to include some dates and not others, draw your cut-off line at a clearly identifiable place and communicate it to everyone who is not allowed to invite someone to accompany them.
Beware, many unmarried people find it tremendously upsetting to not be allowed to bring a date. Prepare them for the idea and pay careful attention to where the singletons sit during dinner.
As for your attendants — letting them bring an escort would be a considerate gesture. It’s not required, but they’ve done a lot for you.
The knot.com also said basically the same thing, plus the whole, ‘if there are a lot of single people, don’t worry’ concept.
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The second thing we’re giving the axe to is inviting KIDS! Ahh - I’m not a baby hater or anything but there’s a snowball’s chance in hell I’m going to let my family and Bobby & I pay for some 5 year old to eat 2 pieces of cut up fillet and push peas around their plate for 45 minutes.
Now, Bobby does have a lot of younger cousins, and I really like them and do wish for them to be apart of our wedding, so we are both ok for ‘kids’ to come to the ceremony but then be dropped off back at the hotel while everyone goes back before the reception to drop their cars off to wait for the buses we’re going to get to shuttle everyone back and forth so there’s no drunk driving.
Martha and knot.com both just recommended to be consistent with cut-off ages and whatever other rules we set.
I know most of our friends won’t give a damn about the plus one thing because they are all friends with one another and most of the ones who do have significant others are in fact in the bridal party and already get one. As for the child thing.. that’s honestly the only thing that makes me worried, sometimes folks just like to bitch to bitch when quite honestly, the majority of the reason why I don’t want kids at the reception is so everyone can have a blast and drink and not have to worry about anything - hopefully that makes the memo when folks get the news haha!
Ohhhh the woes of a bride-to-be.. sighhh.